Friday, December 10, 2010

Garth Brooks Wondering "What Ever Happened To Me"

Former Country Star Realizes He Hasn't Been Seen Or Heard From In 12 Years 

Nashville, TN (CHN) - He was once the reigning King of Country Music and one of the top selling artists of any genre in the 1990's, but this morning when Garth Brooks awoke he asked himself one simple question: "Where in the fuck have I have been the past 12 years". 

Brooks During What Is Believed 
To Have Been His Mariachi Phase
Research done by Brooks indicates that he has mostly been drinking and speaking in non melodic tongues since his failed attempt to perform as a gay rock star under the stage name 'Chris Gaines'.  

Sources close to Brooks admit that they are not all that close to Brooks and that they sort of forgot all about him over the last decade.  

Brooks who claims to have a daughter is now attempting to locate her according to his daughter who hasn't seen or heard from Brooks since 1999. 

Although Brooks was accused of having an affair with Trisha Yearwood in the late 90's he vehemently denied those rumors and one-upped his critics by divorcing his wife and marrying Trisha Yearwood soon after. 

The former star came out of hiding or whatever to do an interview with Larry King this week.  During the interview Mr. Brooks seemed to be fixated with convincing King to direct Itunes to raise the cost of his songs to equal or higher pricing than Taylor Swift and that 'little bitch' Kenny Chesney.

Tomorrow on CHN:  "Trisha Yearwood RealizesThat She Is A Slutty Homewrecker; Wonders Where Husband Garth Brooks Has Been The Past 12 Years."

3 comments:

CHN said...

Former Country Star Realizes He Hasn't Been Seen Or Heard From In 12 Years

Nashville, TN (CHN) - He was once the reigning King of Country Music and one of the top selling artists of any genre in the 1990's, but this morning when Garth Brooks awoke he asked himself one simple question: "Where in the fuck have I have been the past 12 years".

Unknown said...

Lololol! Hilarious! Garth sucks!

Unknown said...

Lololol! Hilarious! Garth sucks!

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