Sunday, January 11, 2009

Pittsburgh Makes Quadrennial Statement:: "We Are Not In Running for Olympic Games"

One more city can be marked off from the list of 2016 Olympic hopefuls.
by: Kaylee Strutt, CHN Sports Editor, 7:30 AM EST

Mayor Luke Ravenstahl made the all-too-familiar speech to local press and the 'Pittsburgh in 2016' Olympic committee comprised of two of Terry Bradshaw's x-wives and several members of ELKS Lodge #11. The press conference marked the 31st time that Pittsburgh has bowed out of the running. Locals argue that this is only the 29th time that Pittsburgh has given up because it was well known that the 12th and 13th Games would be canceled due to WW2.

The Mayor (pictured above) finished with somber comments that Pittsburghians are beginning to know word by word:

"As of the latest count there are 42,624 cities in this great land we call 'America'. Let me remind you that only 6 U.S. cities have ever hosted Olympic games of any type. While we do wish to join those elite cities: Lake Placid, Los Angeles, St. Louis, Atlanta, Squaw Valley, and Salt Lake City - we should also be happy with the present company of the great cities to have never hosted the Olympic games such as: Portland, Milwaukee, Detroit, Boise, Cleveland, and Fresno. Another way to look at it; we are the same as the 99.6% of U.S. municipalities to have never hosted the games. Frankly, we are in good company - did I mention that St. Paul has never held the Olympics... Doug, can you remember - Ok, that's ok; lets assume I had not mentioned St. Paul but now certainly I have.... Thank you all for coming."

The final announcement from the Olympic Committee for the 2016 games will be made by the International Olympic Committee in October of 2009. When reached for comment following Pittsburgh dropout, IOC Spokesperson Tarren Aanika said "Huh....What?"


1 comment:

said...

Thank Pittsburgh!

Moi 'tis too close for THAT to happen.

Who links to me?

Best of the Net Humor Links | Sponsored By The Plastico Blog