Local School Board Breaks Ground, Builds School In One Day

Construction Workers Stood By In Awe As Office Bureaucrats Pulled Off Full Completion In 10 Hours

The 10 Member Team Is Presumably The First Group To Ever Build A School With Gold Shovels

Rochester, NH (CHN) - What was slated to be a simple groundbreaking quickly turned into the completion of a 184,000 square foot elementary school this past Friday. The project followed years of harsh criticism from both parents and teachers that the school board was 'out of touch' and 'not getting resources to the classroom'. 

The construction of the school was slated to take 8 months with a budget of 56 million dollars.  The original plans called for 11 classrooms, cafeteria, offices, and ball fields. Inspectors have now realized that the school board was able to add a gymnasium to the site just by re-using basic construction scraps and items from the County bone-yard. 

The board tried to finish by lunchtime since it was Friday

"We hadn't really talked about it ahead of time," says 4th year board member and retired administrator Cheryl Rice. Looking back Cheryl believes that "once we got started with that first shovel full of dirt we all just looked at each and took that second shovel full.  

Then we took a look at the plan sheets and realized that we were shoveling in the wrong spot... so, we just started following the plan I guess".

"Getting the material to the site was a real burden," added longtime board member Doug Rogers who lost his left arm during a construction accident in hour 4. He admits, "We had our challenges, I never knew that steel reinforced concrete weighed so much for one thing".

On a sad note, Superintendent Ray Bradburn was unable to get the red tape for the ribbon cutting which will postpone the first day of school for several months.  Bradburn did take the time to explain to parents that there is a ribbon factory shutdown in China. 

CHN.2012