Monday, October 18, 2010

Yankees Acquire Cliff Lee for 70 billion Dollars

20 Day Contract Is Largest In Baseball History

New York (CHN) - Joe Girardi was all smiles Monday night despite an embarrassing 8-0 loss to the upstart Texas Rangers.  The Yankees, down 2-1 in the best of 7 series needed  to shake things up after the worst loss in Yankees postseason history. 

"It was tough to watch," admitted Girardi who made the announcement of the blockbuster deal just minutes after the final out of a game that saw Cliff Lee strike out 13 while yielding just two hits.

Clifford Lee Has a 1.34 Career Postseason ERA
Lee is now 7-0 in postseason play, a stat that Yankees General Manager Brian Cashman thought was central to closing the deal.  

"Statistics say that he is perfect, and we buy perfect people here in New York.  We knew we needed to strengthen our starting rotation after this game.  We feel that we have done that tonight by signing a proven southpaw," said Cashman from a statement prepared in the 6th inning.

Lee threw 122 pitches in 8 innings Monday night for the Texas Rangers and will start game 4 for the Yankees on just 19 hours rest.  

"It's what you hope for as a ballplayer, you just want a chance to help a team go all the way," said Lee during the post-game interview. He continued, "Although we are down two games to one because of my great effort tonight, I hope that we can rebound with more great efforts from me to come back and win this thing... I mean we are all in it together," concluded Lee as he briefly side-hugged Joe Girardi and then walked to the Visitors locker room to gather up his things. 

Sources say that the $70 Billion Contract is front-loaded to provide most of the money early  in the 20 day contract.  The Contract explicitly says that 'beating the Fucking Rangers tomorrow' will bolster the signing bonus from an estimated $32 billion over 24 hours to approximately$50 billion.  Although the trade deadline passed months ago the Yankees were able to use a loophole in league rules whereby they explicitly gave Texas absolutely nothing in return for Lee. 


1 comment:

Espn said...

'Lee threw 122 pitches in 8 innings Monday night for the Texas Rangers and will start game 4 for the Yankees on just 19 hours rest.'

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